And before you roll your eyes or scoff, l want to talk about how important setting personal goals is. Because without a purpose to set your sights on, it’s easy to find yourself drawn into a downward spiral of despondency, especially at this time of year.
A personal story
When I was in my teens and early twenties, I used to drift aimlessly from one personal crisis to another with a sort of vague, nebulous hope that something good or exciting would happen to me. I believed that eternal happiness would simply fall into my lap without any kind of effort or intervention from me.
How wrong I was. It wasn’t until the early 1990s, when power-suits and briefcases were the ultimate fashion accessories, that I learned the importance of setting goals. I found myself in a world where profit was king and must be achieved at any cost. This ethic ran deeply against the grain for me and still does. But in this world of go-getting, I learnt a valuable life-lesson: a life without purpose isn’t a life at all.
Follow that star
In the days of sail, mariners used the stars to give them direction. They needed this fixed reference point to stop them drifting off course. Without it they could end up stuck in ‘the Doldrums’, becalmed and unable to move. This expression is still used today to describe a state we sometimes find ourselves in when we have nothing in particular to do, mired in an unbearable ennui that can so easily lead us into increasingly dark or morbid thoughts.
Find meaning
Viktor Frankl, in his book Man’s Search for Meaning, describes how even in the most profound depths of despair, it is a sense of purpose that can make the difference between life and death. Those he encountered in the prison camps of WWII who languished on their bunks waiting for death, were most likely to succumb to weakness and disease. But those inmates who gave themselves little tasks to do, no matter how small, were more likely to survive.
Keep it real
So how do we go about setting personal goals? First of all, the goal or goals we set ourselves must be achievable. Otherwise there’s little point. For example, to make your goal ‘To Win the Lottery’, will not work. You could end up spending your lifesavings and never win because the odds are so heavily stacked against you. Make your goals realistic and measurable, something like: My goal for this year/month/day is to … You fill in the blank!
My big goal for 2024 is to finish my third book. But my goal for today is to tidy out a kitchen cupboard. I may not achieve either of those things, but the beauty of goal-setting is you can tweak and adjust as you go along. So it may be, that because life gets in the way (it always does) I may only finish one chapter of my book, or design the cover, or devise an index page. It doesn’t matter. What matters is I had something to work towards to keep me motivated and out of the doldrums. And as for that kitchen cupboard, well, it can always wait until tomorrow …
Thanks for reading! I'd love to hear your comments.
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